Meerkat Prompts: The Authentic Self
I have been inspired to write this post by not one, but two bloggers who I feel embody authenticity in their writing. The first is Soatok, of Dhole Moments, who has recently spoken of the absence of authenticity. The second is Rawen, of Rawen’s Musings, who wrote a post exploring similar themes.
These posts got me thinking. What does it mean to be authentic, especially in a world where the online, virtual life has come to matter virtually as much as the real one? When precisely am I truly me? If I engage in some honest self-reflection, will I pat myself on the back, or cringe? Will I acknowledge the elephant in the room, namely my reluctant to fully acknowledge my fursona, even though I allude to it all across this site? Do I also pause to acknowledge, in a more meaningful way, my use of AI art, and the disconnect this brings? After all, I pride myself as being an author, creating characters and worlds with my mind, and it would horrify me if AI-generated stories overtook the works of living, breathing human beings, so why do I therefore use AI art, a medium that arguably robs me of my right to be indignant of AI use?
The Furry Problem
There is a huge stigma surrounding furries, though as Soatok points out in his own post, a lot of this is actually latent bigotry against the LGBT community. The realm of anthropomorphic creations could be seen as escapism, where people go to deny reality (especially since reality can be so bleak), but it can also be seen a safe space, where people are free to express who they are, and how they feel, without judgement. A furry coming out among other furries is not going to face the same fire and brimstone they might risk coming out face-to-face with loved ones or friends. Most of the time, the furry community is accepting of this, without so much as a second thought (there are exceptions, as there always are).
Furries, in my experience at least, tend to be friendly and welcoming to all-comers, and furry conventions are colourful, vibrant, creative spaces, accepting of people from all walks of life (again, in general terms, there are exceptions). It is fair to say that furries are not free from trouble, and this gives rise to some outrageous claims. These claims are often based on brief, individual encounters, or stirred up by people who make the association between furries and the LGBT community, in order to further their bigotry.
A lot of people find furries to be weird. They don’t know what to make of furries, so they make some assumptions, and listen to the rumour mill. One of the most absurd claims involves the now-thoroughly debunked idea that schools were providing litter boxes for students who are furries. As you can probably imagine, the political and cultural right had a meltdown over that.
The simple truth is, when you break it down, the furry community is not one gigantic homogeneous lump. Like any community, there’s a range of individuals with different backgrounds, interests, beliefs, and values. The occasionally exuberant activities that some furries enjoy render furries no different to the passionate gatherings of sports fans, sci-fi fans, car enthusiasts, or any other group.
In short, if you are prepared to open your mind a bit, and prepared to look beyond stereotyping… well, those are hardly bad traits, for any walk of life.
The Sense of Self
This is where Rawen’s post comes to the fore. Rawen may or may not agree with me when I say that I consider him be thoroughly authentic! I believe we can be true to ourselves in various different ways. We can be (I know I am guilty of this) so afraid to be ourselves, so fearful of external judgement. The most obvious version of this is where people come out as LGBT to their families, but this fear applies in a number of different ways, across a lot of different categories. We shield elements of ourselves, out of misplaced embarrassment, and shame.
To confer another example, there remains a lot of stereotyping about mental health, and neuro-divergent people. Society has come a long way, but there are still those who unreasonably, and irrationally, harangue others over their mental health, or over issues such as autism. Society can still be very judgemental toward the disabled, and those judgements can be insidious. To take myself as an example, I recently questioned whether or not a new Nintendo game featuring wheelchairs was in poor taste. I now realise the problem rested with me, and I failed to see the act of inclusion for what it was. My prejudice, as well-meaning as it was, was still prejudice.
To loosen the shackles society places upon us, first we must learn to shake them loose from ourselves.
The AI Schism
Authenticity, when creating imagery via AI, can be a challenging conundrum to reconcile with the desire to be a genuine art creator (in that I am an author, and find a great deal of satisfaction in creating worlds and characters). I cannot draw (at least, not very well), but I also wish to express myself visually, and bring my characters and fursona to life. I am not in a position to pay others for artwork, so where do I turn to? Do I not have the right to exploit the tools available to me, in order to create fun and entertaining images? On the other hand, how would I feel if someone created a best-selling book, entirely via AI, thus making all my hard work to write my stories meaningless?
One thing I won’t do, because I don’t think it’s right to (I’ve drawn a line for myself, so to speak), is sell my AI art. How can I accept money for something I did not create? I fed a prompt to an algorithm, pretending I have done otherwise does not sit right with me, and selling that art would feel exploitative. There has to be a line, and that’s mine. How else can I even consider calling myself authentic?!
I feel like I’ve rambled, and is because I have. A lot of thoughts have spilled from this head, and landed in a manner I hope is coherent. Going forward, I will try to sprinkle Meerkat Musings with more hand-drawn art, which will be of dubious quality, but you will know it has come from the heart. Well, from the heart, and a faintly unhinged mind!
Love to you all.
