I recently spotted a post by Citizen Tom that inspired me to write this one. Whilst I may fundamentally disagree with the nuts and bolts of his post, one thought did occur to me: it is important to vote.
I get why some people prefer not to vote at all. It may feel that within any given moment, all the options are poor, and you may regard every candidate as awful. However, voter apathy skews the outcome. Low turnout can lead to an imprecise measure of the public mood. Assumptions can carry serious consequences.
As a hypothetical example, let’s say it was assumed that Labour would comfortably win the next UK election, based on polls and predictions. What if enough people bought into this, and a lot of them shrugged their shoulders and didn’t go out to vote? Meanwhile, passionate Reform supporters would be hitting the ballot boxes, and suddenly they’re gaining a lot more seats, maybe even triggering a hung parliament, or possibly even winning power.
I would consider such a scenario to be disastrous, and it would also not reflect the overall will of the British people, yet if enough people decided not to vote, for whatever reasons, that scenario is also plausible. A failure to use one’s democratic power is an opening to possibilities that might be deemed unsavoury and unfortunate, and complaints about the outcome in such a scenario would seem meaningless. If you have not exercised your right to vote, you can have no complaints about the outcome!
So, I would always suggest getting out and voting. I’d urge people to do so during local elections, referendums and of course, general elections. If you choose to stay home instead, do not moan about the result, and especially about what happens if you feel the country moves in the wrong direction in the wake of that result.
Welcome to the end of July, and the other side of a few interesting experiences…
Power Plays
I have noted the, let’s say, passion of another showroom manager in the past. This guy has caused issues, and generated conflict, whilst at times alternating from this confrontational persona to a slightly more helpful one. The other week he came into the store to do a probation review of a new colleague, who had recently transferred from his store to mine. It made sense for him to do the review, on the grounds of having worked with the newcomer for a lot longer.
What did not make sense to me was how he treated the new guy. He was bullish and aggressive, at least in my opinion, and whilst he was not necessarily wrong in the points he raised (I haven’t worked with the newcomer long enough to form a professional opinion of their abilities), how you raise those points matters. This other manager’s showroom has had quite a bit of staff turnover. I suspect his attitude is a big part of that.
The other issue is how he came along and effectively told the new starter about a bunch of changes he wanted to make to our showroom. This guy is not my manager, and he is no longer my new colleague’s manager either. We have a new manager, and whilst he is still learning the ropes, it will up to him how to run his store. The other guy can throw his weight around as much as he likes; what happens here is not up to him. His suggestions for the showroom are good ones, but the manner of his delivery and the assumptions he makes are off-putting, to put it mildly.
It spins back, once again, to the importance of both what you say, and how you say it. I emphasised to the new guy that his old manager is exactly that: his old manager. This is a new start in a new environment, and whilst we have our problems in that place, I firmly believe we are good at handling people.
Would They? Could They?
The World Cup is over as of publishing this post, but as I typed these words, England were battling – and it was a battle – with Argentina, for a place in the 2026 World Cup Final.
To describe the first spell of the game as ‘combative’ would be an understatement. The Argentines were bullish and assertive in the tackle, though England were not shirking from the fight. However, despite taking the lead, England were unable to hold it, rather stupidly playing a very defensive game, and conceding chance after chance to Argentina. Eventually England got punished, and then Argentina found a late winner.
I am of the opinion that it would best if England did not qualify for future tournaments. If we could somehow be rendered disqualified that would be even better. You cannot get your hopes up about a team that isn’t even there. Defeatist? Maybe, but I am well beyond the point of caring about the national side, who are nothing but failures.
Bitty Days
The morning after the football… well, I wasn’t in the best of moods. The presence of persistent irritants in the form of people did nothing for me. In particular, one customer came in who has repeatedly ordered a host of items online, only to wish to exchange them via the store, largely owing to errors she has made. Just order in the damn store and we will eliminate these issues!
The following day was even more painful. For much of it, despite being a day off work, I could not actually do anything I wanted to do. From around 9.30 am to 3.30 pm I was assembling a dressing table. It was aggravating, sweaty work, and I did not enjoy it. I know I know, that’s life, but it was my first day off for a while, and the whole purpose of a day off is to have a day… off! I need my time to decompress and unwind. It feels like I’ve sacrificed a lot days off to activities and chaos of late, and I really need the next few to be more on my terms, which would involve not going anywhere or doing anything, unless I want to.
Does that desire make me selfish? Well, perhaps. Then again, as I said, I’ve had a lot of recent time off work that’s been chaotic. Given that my time at work has also been pretty chaotic, is it too much to ask for a little bit of me time that is peaceful, and let’s me relax?
The Agony Continues… Literally
One of the side effects of building the dresser is that a bookcase had to be moved from my daughter’s bedroom to the hallway. Last Saturday morning, as I got up to pee, I smashed my toe against it whilst half-asleep and bleary-eyed. If the whole dresser project had not existed, I would not be jabbing my toe against a bookcase on a Saturday morning. It is a further demonstration of how disruption to free time carries an impact, in this case quite literally. Ah well, let’s view my toe as a noble sacrifice for my daughter’s benefit!
Disruption to Work Time
Since my former manager left at the end of May, I have been dealing with some of their customers. One guy has been back and forth for nearly two months, requesting different designs with different tiles and products, but has yet to commit to ordering. I am rapidly growing bored of the constant requests for new designs, and I cannot help but believe he is getting me to do all the work and then purchasing elsewhere. I can’t prove this, but I have to wonder.
In a cheeky move, I’ve asked for a commitment from him. If he places a deposit – which is fully refundable – I will bump his request up the queue. As it stands, I have enough going on to sustain me, and I can’t commit to his stuff as well. I will not bite off more than I can chew, especially if they’re mucking me around.
Right now, I am chasing a three-room lead that looks positive, plus an install quote that will almost certainly become an order, and a regular fitter has put some work my way too. These are quotes that should become good orders, so they are my focus. I feel that’s fair.
I also had a home measure to do, with someone who, via email at least, came across as curt. Their responses to queries about when to pop round were very brief, as though the questions were an irritant. What would they be like face-to-face?!
The Awkward Loiterer
On my way to and from work, I have lately had some awkward encounters with someone best described as a vagabond. They have hovered around an underpass that I usually use as part of my route, and on some of my encounters, they have offered me illegal drugs.
Needless to say, I have said no on each occasion, but they have kept asking. I have to assume they are not entirely all there, since they don’t seem to show recognition of me from previous meetings. I also have to assume they have put these queries to others, and given they’re doing this in an underpass, it’s faintly unsettling. People have no choice but to use it and therefore walk by this guy. He hasn’t struck me as violent, but if he’s a drug user – which seems possible – there’s no telling how he will behave.
With luck, he will move on sooner rather than later.
Dreams of the Past
In one night, I managed to have two dreams that both related to past times. The first involved an old workplace and old colleagues, only they were jumbled up. In the course of office hijinks, I ended up with no clothes on. I know what you’re thinking, and no, it was not that sort of dream. I had to search for my clothes, and eventually found them, though my colleagues were unhelpful in that regard. I was having to crawl around among office desks and computer wires in order to find my trousers and preserve what little dignity I had left!
The second dream took me even further back to the past. This time around, I was starting my final year of senior school, and thus preparing for my GCSEs. Oddly, I wasn’t anxious, but I was sort of glad to be meeting up with familiar faces, even if in the dream none of them were actually familiar. The biggest peculiarity of this dream was the presence of some sort of mini zoo, as a way of relaxing students back into the school year. It didn’t make sense in the dream, it doesn’t make sense now.
New Tenants
Britain has a new prime minister. Andy Burnham was the overwhelming choice of the ruling Labour party, and he has replaced Keir Starmer. The hope is that he will look to appeal more to Labour’s traditional base. Whether he actually introduces policies that you’d expect from Labour, or whether he continues Labour’s strange attempt to straddle the right and the left of UK politics, remains to be seen.
Constant Pain
I’ve spent the last few days – weeks really – in a state of increasing pain, which is centred mostly around my left shoulder. I know I know, I ought to see a doctor, but I’ve been doing the typical man thing of putting it off in the hopes I magically get better. I might have to bite the bullet and go anyway. Sleep is hard when you can’t settle thanks to unrelenting, steady pain.
Rogue AI
This is fascinating stuff, if also a little disturbing, and I might have to develop this into a full-blown blog entry. Earlier this month, a tech start-up firm called Hugging Face was hacked, but not by a human being. An AI system developed by OpenAI went rogue, and got loose from a sandbox environment, then went after the start-up, and it did this entirely of its own will. It had been undergoing testing, and it had been designed to operate autonomously, when it got loose, so to speak.
Now, we’re not looking at Skynet just yet, but it does raise questions. This is the first such incident that we know of. Has it happened before? Will it happen again, especially since AI models are becoming increasingly sophisticated? What might be the consequences if such a rogue AI hacked into more sensitive locations?
It’s an uncomfortable instance of fact meeting fiction, and I for one would rather not play out the fiction angle too much.
The Offer… That I Easily Refused
Without naming names, I was contacted by a publisher! Great right? It would mean I can get my books back out via the traditional route.. or did it? The publisher in question did not offer a traditional form of publishing, but rather, operated with what’s known as the vanity model.
With traditional publishing, you do not pay a penny toward the production and marketing of your book. The publisher makes a profit from the sales of your book, so in principle both parties have a vested interest in promotional and marketing activities, as well as ensuring your book is as polished as could be. With the vanity model, the publisher asks for a great deal of money upfront, placing your almost entirely at their mercy. Once they have your money, what guarantee is there of a return on your investment? This particular publisher wanted a minimum of £3,100, which needless to say, they aren’t getting from me!
After all, once they have such a sum, they don’t have to particularly try on your behalf. What is their incentive? They’ve effectively been paid. Your account is looking empty, and you might still end up having to do a lot of the marketing and promo work yourself (which you ought to be doing anyway!).
In short, I’d rather keep that desired, and risky, investment in my bank account, and self-publish, than seek out a vanity publisher!
And then there were Four
For the first time in a long time, there is a team of four at work. From being just me for virtually all of June, to being joined at the start of July, to having a full team come the end of the month, is quite the turnaround! Whether the place winds up feeling crowded is up in the air, but it’s nice to have a full team, provided there is enough work to go around. If not, someone will feel pinched. I’d sooner that someone was not me.
Then again, when it comes to the systems and processes and product, I am by far the most experienced person in the showroom, by a factor of years. That should serve me in good stead, at least for a while. I don’t want to be relied upon to deal with every query, but I don’t mind in the short term. Let’s how how this plays out.
My Number is in the Ether
Every now and then, I’ll get WhatsApp messages from abroad. I’ve never been quite sure where these people get my number from, but not only did I have a message enquiring about my books from Nigeria, they tried to call me. They then left a voicemail.
I am wary enough of any random caller, regardless of where they are from, but these sorts of messages automatically make me think ‘scam’. I have had plenty of faux requests for info that rapidly evolve into efforts to sell me something. Finding my books is not hard, so requests to find them strike me as weird. I definitely need to find out how people are finding my number.
Dreams of Thieves
In a night where sleep did not come easily (thanks to some very noisy foxes, at least one of which was in our front garden), the dream that did visit me was, as is now rather typical, most peculiar. My wife, daughter and I were on holiday somewhere, and that somewhere involved a sort of casino/club, with a vault. At some stage during the night, the vault mysteriously opened, and in an act decidedly against my natural instinct, I started to take the unguarded money. My wife urged me to take more, but it was left entirely up to me to hide it on my person!
We fled amidst the chaos of panicked security and other guests, we made a hasty escape! Before long we had made our way to our hotel room, and we were preparing to leave. As we packed our things, police stopped my wife, and there was some discussion about her military(!) past. Then I woke up. For the record my wife has never been in the military!
Looking Ahead
August will be an interesting month. Work will see a full team (albeit my new manager is off on holiday for half the month!). I will aim to republish the paperback editions of The Awakening and The Schism, with the possibility of springing The Forest on an unsuspecting public.
I’ll also be looking to continue writing, and building my own personal interconnected universe of stories. I’m getting there, even if writing has felt a bit like a chore of late. The setback with my previous publisher does hurt, but sometimes, pain is the crucible in which we are forged!
As a young meerkat I, like a lot of kids, was fascinated by dinosaurs. These powerful, imposing beasts dominated our planet for millions of years, and then, as though someone snapped their fingers, they were gone. From the sheer variety of them, to their violent demise, dinosaurs have never been far away from the public imagination, ever since they were recognised for what they are.
I say that, because dinosaur fossils have been dug up for centuries, but for a long time people didn’t know what they were looking at. In some parts of the world bones were considered to be dragon remains, whilst in other locations people thought they’d found the remains of literal giants. It wasn’t until the early 19th century that people began to recognise a pattern, and develop an understanding that these fossils were in fact, from several creatures of various shapes and sizes.
As discoveries continued, more and more species were unearthed, and they were found all around the world. Naturally this prompted questions. Myths of dragons and other legendary creatures might not have been true, but might there have been something to inspire these tales? With the development of scientific methods and advancements to technology, people put the pieces together – literally and figuratively – and learned that these animals had lived and died not merely several thousand years ago, but millions of years ago. Not only that, scientists learned that dinosaurs had walked the earth for millions of years.
The first dinosaurs evolved in the late Triassic period, emerging some 237 million years ago. As a group, they survived the Triassic/Jurassic extinction event, and thrived during the Jurassic period, becoming the dominant group of animals until the end of the Cretaceous period, some 66 million years ago. In other words, for 171 million years, dinosaurs ruled the world.
In this time, iconic creatures emerged. Everyone has heard of the tyrannosaurus rex, initially noted for being a predator, though some experts believe the t-rex might have been a scavenger. The Jurassic Park films made the velociraptor famous for being an intelligent, fast pack hunter, though some of the behaviours attributed to the velociraptor can actually be attributed to the deninonychus (you can thank Michael Crichton for the confusion; he wanted a dramatic name for his chief dino antagonists).
Dinosaurs reigned supreme, right up until they suddenly didn’t. The fossil records showed an abrupt end to their time on earth, which led to a lot of speculation. Climate change was suggested as an option, brought on by volcanic activity. Others theorised about an asteroid impact. The discovery of a masssive impact crater off the coast of Mexico heightened interest in the impact theory, and studies of the crater – which had been stumbled upon by accident – revealed the blast that made it occurred around the same time of the dinosaurs’ extinction.
Additional evidence has been found across the world, in the form of material ejected from the asteroid. This material formed the K-Pg boundary, a thin line of rock containing a lot more iridium than found in other bands. The iridium was either present in the asteroid or produced as a product of the impact, but either way, dating methods showed it tied into the timing of the dinosaurs’ demise.
In recent years, scientists have suggested that there might have been various factors that hastened the end of the dinosaur. The impact theory has plenty of evidence to support it, but it’s possible the dinosaurs faced multiple threats. The release of large quantities of volcanic material from the Deccan Traps (a large region in what is now India) was thought to be a contributing cause, as these erupted over the span of a few million years, overlapping with the impact. This idea has taken a backward step of late; it’s known the traps erupted, but whether they actually contributed to a meaningful degree is disputed.
They held sway over the world for over one hundred and seventy million years, and in some respects, dinosaurs hold sway now. Their story continues to captivate the imagination. How they lived, hunted and survived in a world very different to what we see now is the subject of numerous documentaries and stories. How they perished is equally as fascinating. They are truly amazing!
In an earlier Meerkat Books post, I warned of scammers who would aim to sell you impossible dreams about promotion and reach. This is certainly a problem within the author community, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t legitimate promotional and marketing services out there, if you are willing to pay. My advice is to do your homework, and seek out credible services. In the meantime, there are plenty of steps you can take to keep your books in the public eye, by following the principle of ABP: Always Be Promoting.
Promoting your work can feel like a slog. You may spend a lot of time putting together blog articles and social media posts, and you may feel like there’s very little return on that. Perhaps there won’t be, but what guarantees there won’t be is if you stop. If you are self-published, there is zero chance of your book gaining any momentum if you stop sharing details of it. Even with a publisher, if you don’t share your book across social media, you won’t gain a lot of traction.
I’d recommend being present on sites like Goodreads, and it’s worth setting up a Facebook page that relates to your brand. Be active on Twitter, and any other social media feed you feel comfortable using. If you are a member of any web forums, regardless of what they are about, add your book links to your signature. If you can, schedule posts about your posts and join groups on social media that are relevant to your material.
Basically, never stop talking about your books. Keep spreading the word. Always Be Promoting!
Eggs are quintessentially versatile, and something of a staple food across nations and cultures. They work on their own, in several different ways, and are an integral part of recipes for both sweet and savoury dishes. They are also simply rather yummy!
If you asked this meerkat for his opinion on the best way to serve eggs, I’d probably go with fried, though boiled also works really well, as long as the yolk is runny. I am less fond of hard-boiled eggs, though not against them. Scrambled eggs are my least-preferred option, and somewhere in-between are poached eggs, which are great, when done properly. Personally, I cannot poach an egg to save my life!
I think it boils down to (urgh) simplicity. Fried eggs are easy (or over-easy), Boiled eggs are pretty easy. Scrambled eggs don’t take a lot of effort. Poached eggs involve creating a vortex in the water and hoping the white doesn’t spin off into a chaotic mess. I’m sure there are easier ways to poach, but I don’t know what those are.
You can bake eggs in an oven, which as far as I can gather is similar to frying, except the egg is heated from above rather than fried from below. I have no memory of trying baked eggs.
There are other ways to cook them, and certainly plenty of ways to incorporate them into other meals. Omlettes come to mind. Eggs are an essential element of quiches. They also form a vital component of other recipes, including plenty of sweet treats!
I am not a great lover of custard, though sometimes I do rather fancy it, and custard is definitely an egg-heavy product. Meringue is all about egg whites, whipped into a foamy consistency. Egg custard tarts take the custard idea to a whole new level (and they are pretty good). Sponges and cakes incorporate eggs to varying degrees.
Eggs are great, cracking even (I will not stop the puns, not sorry), but it’s peculiar isn’t it? How did we, as a civilisation, decide that this small oval object that’s popped out of a chicken (or a duck, or some other fowl), should be cracked open, and the contents eaten? Then again, I suppose how we came to eat anything was all about trial and error for a long time. Perhaps desperation drove our ancestors to see what an egg was like, and from there, further experimentation led to all the unique ways of using eggs that we know of today.
It’s the return of… The Meerkat Muse! The crowd goes wild! Or not…
The Twinge
There’s nothing like being in pain to make you tired.
Kicking off from the very end of the previous Muse, one thing I managed to do whilst waiting for my wife and daughter down A&E was to hurt my back. I’m not sure how, but I think the simple act of kneeling to check what was in a vending machine was enough to pull something. The pain conspired to make it hard for me to sleep, and on top of that, the cat decided he wanted out at some unholy hour. What with work the next day, I had to contend with the rudeness of the alarm, and the early task of dealing with the bins as well (Wednesdays are usually bin day in my neck of the woods).
From there, I stared down the barrel of another long day at work. Whilst I have a new colleague, so far our shift patterns have still led to a fair bit of lone-working. As ever, this is marked with long spells of seeing no one, punctuated by periods of awkward enquiries and groups of people, all at once.
As a case in point (and I suppose this could have squeaked into the previous Muse, if not for the chaotic events of the hospital), a guy came into the showroom determined to buy up displays and get deals. Something about him seemed brash, and he rubbed the wrong way with the wheeler-dealer attitude. The prices are the prices, they are not controlled by me, and that’s that. He wanted cheap stuff for a rental property. There are alternative retailers that would offer him far better options for that sort of thing, so please, don’t waste my time when I know our prices will be beyond what you want to pay.
There was also a guy who has dragged out the design process, requesting redesign after redesign, and it’s getting ridiculous now. Either commit or don’t. I’m tempted to suggest he needs to place a deposit against a quote before I agree to keep redesigning everything. I also can’t help but wonder if he’s getting the store to do all the work, then going elsewhere.
The Inevitable Law of Sod
Back on the 1st of July, England were facing DR Congo in the Round of 32 at the World Cup. Owing to the timezone difference, this game would kick off at 5pm UK time. My only hope of watching the first half was via my phone, since I’d be at work. The odds of it being busy so close to closing, and during an occasion where England would be playing, would surely be slim?
Of course not. It was only good fortune that saw the arrivals also leave within half an hour of the game’s start. In other circumstances, I have not been so lucky. I awaited with baited breath to see if anyone else would show up, and as sure as night follows day, barely a few minutes into the match, people wandered in.
I get it, we’re technically still open, but even if there wasn’t an England game on, we’re not far away from closing time, so spare me the awkwardness and do not delay my departure for home by showing up so late!
I also waited to see if England might actually put in a decent shift. The performances up to that point had been sterile, with only the occasional burst of quality. The risk of a disaster could not be entirely ignored.
In the end England scraped through 2-1. I’d actually hoped they’d go out, so we could be spared all this rubbish.
The End… or is it?
My (former) publisher has decided they no longer wish to continue our arrangement. All rights to my books have reverted to me. I won’t lie, this was initially a body blow, but it is what it is. There were always challenges to a trans-Atlantic relationship, and in the end, they had to make a call based on what was best for them. I wish to thank Jumpmaster Press for that initial opportunity and all their guidance.
As to what happens now, I am pursuing options. Do I return to self-publishing avenues, or seek out a new publisher? I’ve contacted some agencies, since having an agent greatly helps with representation. I’ve also contacted some publishers.
What I decided upon was to self-publish, in the name of keeping my existing work in the public eye, so to speak. I decided to use IngramSpark, which allows for a greater field of sharing than Amazon KDP alone. I will say this, IngramSpark is more fiddly to use, and could do with a much friendlier interface for formatting. In the meantime, The Awakening is back online, currently via Amazon, but it should filter to other locations soon.
The flipside to all this is that The Forest is now on hold. I won’t publish it until I have settled on the right avenue. Watch this space for more!
World Cup Woes – or Wonders?
With any international competition, there is always the chance that games will be aired at troublesome times. England’s Round of 16 clash with Mexico would kick off at 1am on Monday the 6th, an awkward occasion for fans back in England, not to mention workplaces and schools, who had to consider allowances for employees and students. Pubs were also in something of a scramble, hastily applying to open late, whilst law enforcement had to make some last-minute new arrangements too.
In the wake of all of that, would it prove worth it? Would England prevail against a Mexico side with a formidable home record? Well, somehow they did! I didn’t stay up to watch the game, what with having to be up early for work in the morning, but I checked the score upon waking up to learn that we’d won, 3-2, and somehow overcame a tricky banana skin tie at one of the most hostile venues in the football world. England were into the quarter-finals, where Norway, the slayers of five-time world champions Brazil, would wait.
Project Hail Mary
I need to write a proper review of this film, but my wife, daughter and I sat and watched it the other night. It was incredible, and full of hope, joy, bravery and love. It’s the sort of optimistic movie the world sorely needs, and if you don’t fall in love with Rocky, you ironically have a heart of stone.
Meet the New Boss
Last Monday I got to formally meet my new manager. He seems pleasant enough, and hopefully now we’re a team of three again, we can build good working relationships and make progress as a showroom. His interests include Nintendo and Formula 1, so there is a nice overlap!
The Case of Complete Panic!
My wife took my daughter to the cinema the other day, and whilst she was sorting out the tickets, she messaged me to say she was going to call me, and that something was wrong. This vague message sent me into a spiral. What was wrong? Was it something relating to our daughter, who has had that scary recent health scare? Was my wife nursing some kind of problem?! Needless to say, the nature of this was terrifying to me.
It turned out that my daughter had lost her mobile phone. Now, I will grant this is not great news, but in comparison to what it could have been, it was something of a relief! Please do not panic me via phrasing! I don’t need the stress!
What make it all more awkward is that these messages were coming through just as people were wandering into the shop. It’s Sod’s Law to see no one, and then clusters of people at the worst possible time. It drives me insane, right at a point where I don’t need it!
22 Years
Last week marked 22 years since I met my wife. It also occurred to me that I have now been with her for half my life. That’s pretty crazy.
To mark this occasion we ventured into London (I must confess to growing weary of going back and forth into London) to see Beetlejuice the Musical. In a further confession, the late start and late finish of this (a 7.30 start, and a run-time of two hours and forty minutes, plus the journey home, meant realistically not getting home till nearly midnight) was not something I savoured. It didn’t help that we spent all day in London, in searing heat.
Still, the show was great. It was chaotic and hilarious, and yet had some very heartfelt moments too. I’d highly reccommend it, but the ads warn under-16s need to be accompanied by an adult, and that’s a well-earned piece of advice!
Prior to settling in to watch this explosive and entertaining affair, our little family unit did a bit of exploring too. The usual suspects of Forbidden Planet and a particular anime shop my daughter likes were visited upon. We also had lunch at a rather nice little Italian place, just outside Forbidden Planet. It was a nice way to mark 22 years of togetherness!
Some pics from a busy day:
The Case of Tyre-Kickers
What’s something that anyone working in retail sales can do without? Time wasters. What did last Saturday see a lot of? Time wasters. One family in particular has been in several times now, and they never commit to anything. At the weekend they left several tiles laying around, having pulled apart our displays. I cannot stand that. They lingered in the showroom for ages, which is paralysing. You feel like you’re taking a risk if you need to pee, in case they choose that moment to start asking questions. In fact, it’s virtually a guarantee that they’ll choose the most awkward moment to ask questions. It’s aggravating, to put it mildly.
Saturday was far too ‘peopley’ for my liking. There are days where I desire no human interaction. Why is it that on those days, it feels like buses are delivering people straight to the showroom door?!
The Amazon Con
Twice within a matter of days, I’ve had phone calls from people purporting to be from Amazon. Their calls have queried alleged large orders placed on my account, specifically for iPhones.
I haven’t placed any such orders.
The bottom line is that these calls are scams. They are aiming to somehow harvest my account details, and use them for who-knows-what. When such a call came in on Saturday, I simply hung up. I was too tired from the trip to London to concern myself with desperate bids to extort me.
The Three Lions
Saturday evening – 10 pm to be precise – brought with it England versus Norway, for a place in the World Cup semi-finals. Would England fall to the slayers of Brazil? Or would Kane and Bellingham inspire England to move into the last four?
Would I finish off the small beer keg I bought whilst watching the game?
Well, the keg was largely drained. England were driving me to drink. They fell behind and equalised in the first half, and subsequently looked laboured under the hot Miami sun in the second half. Norway certainly seemed to have the better of the game. An extra-time winner from Jude Bellingham (who had also equalised for England) sent the Three Lions into a semi-final clash with Argentina. Manager Thomas Tuchel was rightly angry with his team for the way they played.
A great deal of improvement would be required if England were to reach the final, especially since we’d be facing a Messi-inspired Argentina.
The Very Long Day
On Sunday I had a a three-room design appointment, which was quite time-consuming and also rather draining. On Monday I experienced the same thing, but to a far greater degree. One customer occupied my time from 10.30 to 4.45. I ended up foregoing my lunch (somehow this elder lady also did not desire lunch). The whole experience may lead to some big orders, but honestly, the whole process was extremely draining by the end. I am utterly out of love with it all, and could have done with a less design-intensive couple of days.
One day my local bookstore will hire me, I know it. Freedom is a step away!
A Sense of Weariness
As this Muse draws to its end, I feel very, very tired. I feel sort of drained. The first half of July has been a bit too busy for my liking, and I feel like I’m shifting into the realm of ‘Old Man Meerkat’. I don’t especially want to go anywhere on my days off work; peaceful, quiet days are what I desire, and need. There has simply been too much going on for me to have enthusiasm for being busy. Whether the Fates will grant me peace is another matter entirely.
The world will keep on grinding away, and it sort of feels like it’s grinding away at me. Ah well, all I can do is my best, and see what happens. Until next time!
I should add an important disclaimer to this post. You see, it was originally published more than 20 years ago, via a long-defunct site called The Site of Sothis, an old moniker of mine. It was shortly thereafter that Darth Timon replaced Sothis, and of course, in modern times I go by Ben Berwick, since I have nothing to hide.
I’m also not hiding the rather terrible state of this original post. I actually wrote it entirely in red, to emphasise what irritated me. I would like to think that my standards of spelling and grammar have improved in the 20+ years since I wrote that post, which I share below. I’ve taken out one element, which relates to a football star’s alleged affair (it was all over the news in the mid 2000s). I don’t feel that’s relevant anymore.
I’m sure all of us have things that make us snarl with anger or irritation or frustration. Well, here are a few of mine…
1. Have you ever been waiting in line a bus stop or in a queue in a store, stuck there as someone at the front of the queue dithers? It’s one of my pet peeves- if you’re paying bus fare or for goods in a shop, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE YOUR MEANS OF PAYMENT READY!!! Transactions should be conducted swiftly and without stopping to chat to the bus driver/cashier, otherwise what happens is that everyone else in the queue will get grumpy.
2. Similar to the first problem, is the problem of cashiers who dither. They process your purchase very slowly, or are having a good old chit-chat to a friend on another till. If you’ve got customers, they want to buy their item and go- they’re not interested in how you spent your weekend!
3. Blockadges. By this I mean, people in an aisle with a trolley (shopping cart to Americans) who somehow manage to stop so they and their trolley are impeding the aisle. DO NOT IMPEDE THE AISLE! It does nothing except piss off anyone and everyone who is trying to get past you.
4. Bots. Specifically, the kind of bot that spams you when you’re using a messenger program. I am NOT interested in it’s sordid little links or attempts to get me to pay to see a webcam girl do things I’ve already seen.
6. Arrogance. People who act like they know it all and who can presume that they can tell you what you know too. People, at the end of the day, no one can tell you what your limits are, or set your limits for you. You are the one who decides what you are ready for and what you are capable of. People who try to do that for you, who presume they have the right to do that, should be ignored.
7. Computer glitches. These drive me mad. Why it can’t be that a computer is made that can actually cope with the rigours of games and the internet. I can’t stand Windows errors and I HATE it when I’m in the middle of a game, at an intense moment, and BLAM! It crashes.
Well, those are seven things that make me see red. Who knows, this page may grow in time. For now, that’s all folks!
Yes, I have shared it in red too, for posterity!
Some of these things don’t annoy me the way they used to, though sources of frustration can be still be found. It is irritating to be trying to get down the aisle at the local supermarket, only to be blocked by people who park trollies at strange angles. If you have the audacity to move their trolley they’ll give you the evil eye, but come on, show some awareness. It’s not difficult.
I think a lot of those early irritants had to do with patience. Whether caught behind someone who wasn’t ready to board a bus, or waiting for the cashier to sort themselves out, or whether I was stuck down an aisle because of oblivious trolley-wielders, a lot of these sources of anger relate to my time being impeded. To be fair, that’s something that still annoys me, though I dare say I manage it better. That said, anything that impacts my free time can be painful to me.
My free time is limited. My days off are precious to me. I work long hours, so whether at the end of the day, or on a day off, what I want is to decompress and unwind on my terms. I appreciate that isn’t always possible, but sometimes I feel like my time is not my own, especially when caught up in queues because both customer and cashier are conspiring to be awkward.
Do I still find bots a chore to deal with? Sure. These days, they don’t get under my skin quite so much. Arrogance remains aggravating, though perhaps not as much. Computer glitches… well, that depends. If it costs me a lot of work and ends up costing me money, you can bet that will piss me off!
The other day, Reform MP Nigel Farage announced he was resigning as MP for Clacton-on-Sea. He made this declaration because of questions that have dogged him around large and undeclared donations, donations which have led to a Parliamentary enquiry. However, Farage is not planning to go anywhere. His resignation will trigger a by-election, and he intends to take part in it, in order to beat the ‘establishment’. At present though, none of the major political parties intend to dispute his reelection.
This is because Farage’s gesture is performative. He wants to beat the big parties to show he has public support and that he is a ‘man of the people’. He claims to be an alternative to the ‘establishment’. Never mind that he has had the benefit of private education and has ties to various businesses, much like most politicians. Never mind that his Reform Party have many former Tory MPs on their books. Never mind that in the end, Farage is as establishment as they get. All of this is about sticking a finger up at the pecking order, except in reality it’s no such thing.
It also won’t help him. The investigation into his donations has been paused due to his resignation, but if he were to win the by-election, the investigation would resume. If he has nothing to worry about, the investigation should not concern him, but Farage, the man worth millions who claims to be on the side of the average Brit, is afraid of scrutiny, hence his performative gesture.
What makes this more interesting is that so far, there is one candidate prepared to challenge him. Count Binface.
Yes, we have a politician called Count Binface here. He even has a party named after him.
Satirical political parties are nothing new in the UK, but the prospect of Count Binface being the only person to take on Farage underscores how Farage is not taken seriously in this moment in time. What’s worse, whilst it seems highly unlikely Count Binface would win the by-election, if he did, it would destroy Farage’s credibility.
What Farage now faces is a rock and a hard place. He will either win a virtually uncontested by-election, which won’t prove anything as to whether or not he can stick it to the man, and then face a renewed investigation into his donations, or he can lose to Count Binface, and look like a complete laughing stock. Personally, considering how much damage Farage has done via Brexit, I can’t think of two better outcomes. He is reaping what he has sown, and all the foot-stomping in the world won’t change that.
With a bit of luck, the ultimate establishment crony will see his political career in ruins, very soon, one way or the other.
Life rarely hands you everything you want on a platter, and it rarely runs smoothly. I recently had a setback regarding my author ambitions, when I was ‘let go’ by my publisher. It was difficult, because becoming an author was an amazing achievement, and to have it… well, not exactly yanked away, but certainly rendered more challenging, it was a blow.
The first point I wish to make is that it’s ok to feel a bit down after receiving bad news. We’re human beings, not robots. Emotions aren’t going to disappear. Unwelcome information of any kind can hurt, and that’s totally normal. You’re allowed to feel miserable, angry and confused.
What differentiates people is what comes next. Do you allow negative emotions to cloud your judgement and shape what you do next? In my darkest moments, I considered erasing everything I have written and casting it all into the void. I didn’t do that, because that would be a betrayal of myself. I have worked hard to get books into print, and you know what? I stand by the quality of my work. No, I am not Shakespeare or Stephen King, but I got a publisher to take a chance on me.
You only truly fail if you stop trying. You only need one attempt to succeed. It isn’t always easy, but with that in mind, it is also perfectly acceptable to pause, to reset one’s self, and take some ‘me’ time. No one can run at a hundred percent, one hundred percent of the time.
Learn from your mistakes and your failures, but don’t berate yourself over them. I can be my own worst enemy, micro-analysing every misstep I’ve ever made, but what purpose does that serve? Who does it help? There are enough people who want to take you down a peg or two, without doing so yourself. It’s also important to remember that not everything that goes wrong is your fault. Life happens. Other people make choices that affect you, for good or bad. You can’t chastise yourself over other people’s decisions. Dust yourself down, take a moment if you need it, and don’t give up.
Six months down, six to go! Summer has landed, the World Cup is well underway, and I am the bearer of some exciting news! Well, exciting if you’re into books…
Kord Enterprises
You may be thinking ‘eh?’ I wouldn’t blame you. Let me explain. Kord Enterprises is a Florida-based company that produces TV shows, and my publisher, Jumpmaster Press, has struck a deal with them to develop JMP books into shows or movies. Now, this is all tentative at this point. There’s no promise of my books becoming shows or films. It’s down to Kord Enterprises to take note of what I’ve written, and work with Jumpmaster Press and myself to turn the written form into something else. Still, the possibility is there. It would certainly be absolutely awesome!
The Resumption of Summer
The first half of June was a bit uninspiring, as far as the weather was concerned. Fortunately, it picked up again over the second half, perhaps even pushing into uncomfortable territory (what can I say, it’s a great British pastime to moan about the weather!). Ultimately, I will take sunshine and heat over grey clouds and rain, any day, even if I get altogether rather too sweaty.
Busy Sundays
I don’t know what it is about Sundays that brings scores of people to the showroom. You’d think people would have better things to do than wander about a bathroom showroom! To make matters worse, the early appointment featured a lady who did not stop coughing. I cannot afford to get ill, not least of all with my daughter’s upcoming surgery! I wish people who have a cold or bug would stay away from showrooms. Think about others!
I guess on one level, I get it. Weekends are opportunities for people to get out and get things done. From the perspective of someone who has to work most Sundays, it’s aggravating to face a stream of people coming and going, especially since I am on my own and can’t hope to deal with them all.
How are England’s Fortunes?
I mentioned the World Cup earlier, and let’s touch base on that a bit more. So far, it’s seen some unpredictable results, but also some that are perhaps more in keeping with expectations. England’s first game, against Croatia, provided moments to be pleased, but also moments of pain, in what was ultimately a 4-2 win for the Three Lions. Work on defending was sorely needed, but as is by now quite typical, England looked at their best when attacking and working the ball quickly. If only we’d play like that more often!
Indeed, the proof of this was in the pudding, as it were. A tame 0-0 draw with Ghana was followed by a laboured 2-0 win against Panama. So far, there is no reason for anyone to fear England, and it’s adding up to limping out at the quarter-final stage, if we even get there.
Castiel’s Friend
My cat is not a people person, or a cat person. He adores my wife, and I dare say he is fond of my daughter and I, but outside of that family unit, he is a bit standoffish, and will generally withdraw from company. With other cats, he is even worse, and tends to give them a wide berth. Well, that is the assumption. The few cats we have in our neck of the woods tend to avoid each other, though one tends to get in hissing matches with Castiel, and other felines in the area.
There is one exception. Castiel has become friendly with a cat we’ve named Soot Sprite, who may or may not be a stray. Soot Sprite has been neutered (you can tell by a nick in his ear), which implies he was owned at one stage, but he’s noted for going around the area, seeking affection and food from various doors. He is a sweet cat, and rather remarkably, a cat Castiel gets on with.
What is uncertain is whether or not Castiel would tolerate it if Soot Sprite actually moved in. Castiel’s been an only cat for most of his life. How would he feel about another cat getting laps, cuddles, etc? Also, I don’t think we can really afford to take on another cat, and Soot Sprite might have a home. Still, his visits are welcome, and it’s nice that Castiel seems to think so too!
No Longer Alone
A major change at work is the arrival of not one, but two new colleagues. They joined on the 22nd, with one being someone already acquainted with how my employer works, having transferred from another store. The big benefit of this is that there is someone else who knows the system, how to do designs, handle the daily stuff etc. It’s not all on my shoulders anymore.
My new colleague is a writer, which is interesting, and it potentially opens the floor to working together.
The second new arrival is the new store manager. It was not offered to me and I did not want the job, so I didn’t apply for it. The new manager has come from outside the business, so they will need time to bed in. Initially, they’d be training elsewhere, to hit the ground running when they arrived.
At least the end of day after day of lone-working has come to an end. If I am to remain trapped at my current employer for the immediate future, it is best that I am not alone!
The End of Starmer
Speculation about Keir Starmer’s tenure as Prime Minister has been rife, especially since Andy Burnham won a by-election in Makerfield. The mood in Parliament is such that despite Starmer inheriting a huge mess from the Conservatives, somehow his failure to fix 14 years of turmoil and misery in just two years marks him out as a terrible PM. To be clear, I don’t think he’s been the best PM, but when weighed up against the likes of Boris Johnson, Liz Truss and Rushi Sunak? The Tories set a very low bar to clear, but Starmer did clear it, and comfortably so.
Nonetheless, it seems that we’re mired in a pattern of shifting prime ministers in this country. No one can figure out the Brexit question, and no one is brave enough to suggest that we rejoin the EU (really the only smart thing to do). Combined with false impressions about the state of the country, Starmer has decided it’s time to go.
Is it the right move? I don’t think Starmer has been brilliant, but I am also fully aware of the scale of the challenge he faced, and the chaos he took on. Whomever replaces him has to keep that in mind, but what I would like to see now is an actual left-wing government, with policies that look to help more than the wealthy. Will anyone be bold enough to provide that?
Epic Storms
Last week, among the threat of temperatures rising as high as 40C in some parts of the UK, the clouds gathered, the humidity rose, and sure enough, there was a thunderstorm. This was possibly the most epic thunderstorm I’ve ever encountered, if nothing else for the sheer duration of it. It began not long after going to bed, and it carried on for most of the night, with regular crackles of thunder and flashes of lightening.
The rain was something else. It persisted, well after the thunder and lightening had abated, and varied in intensity throughout the night. It soaked my corner of Essex, and also my poor cat! My wife and I did try to call him inside at various points, but he didn’t show up until the morning, looking quite bedraggled. It’s his own fault really; if he had come when called, he might not have been soaked to the bone.
One inevitable consequence of the storm was that it kept me awake most of the night, and guess who had work the next day? I could certainly have done without the alarm’s cruel call, but alas, duty called. Coffee would be my friend.
In the aftermath of the storm, we entered into a heatwave, the sort of heatwave that the UK is becoming more acquainted with, albeit against our will. UK homes are built to trap heat, as our winters are traditionally quite cold. The same applies to workplaces. With the mercury now spilling over 30C as a matter of routine, and now threatening to poke 40C on a semi-regular basis, we could do with a change in how we approach our daily lives. Somehow, there still isn’t a legal point at which it is too hot to work. We’re sending our kids to school in these conditions, where they bake in classrooms ill-equipped to cope with it.
Throughout all of this, people will still pour scorn on the concept of climate change. Well, we’re living it people, and it’s only gonna get worse.
The Cough
With my daughter’s operation drawing closer, one thing I have been determined to do is avoid any form of illness that I could pass on to her, such as a cold. It has therefore been extremely displeasing to encounter customers in the shop who do nothing but cough with alarming regularity. It sounded like the sort of dry, persistent cough that could have meant anything, and it irked me. I tried to give the gentleman a wide berth, especially since he wouldn’t follow that meaningful convention of putting his hand over his mouth.
I am not prone to swearing on this blog, but believe me when I say that my thoughts consisted of ‘fuck off!’ the entire time he was in the showroom. Colds and bugs would spread far less if the people who have them avoided going to shops. I know that’s not always possible, but a lot of the time, nothing is so pressing, least of all where I work, that you have to come in and risk spreading your illness to everyone else. Have some respect.
Hopefully the End of It
Here’s hoping.
On Friday, my wife, daughter and I headed to London, in preparation for my daughter’s next, and with luck, final operation, regarding her thyroid issue. This procedure should conclusively deal with this worrisome matter, once and for all. Still, as with the first time around, the prospect of my precious baby girl going under the knife was an anxious one.
I wasn’t quite as troubled as before, I guess because we now knew the general pattern of what was to come. Nonetheless, and despite knowing this surgery is for the best, I could not help but experience nerves beforehand. I can’t imagine any parent wanting their kid to go through anything like this, even with the knowledge that it will effectively cure the problem. I just wanted the whole process to be over, with the need for further stays in London and fraught hospital experiences to be done and dusted.
The travel into London was quite a challenge. Temperatures, which had already spiked, were spiking again. The UK is not cut out for regular temps over 30C, so when the mercury pushes 35C and over, we really do suffer. Our homes are designed to trap heat, owing to traditionally colder winters, and cooler periods across spring and autumn. Air conditioning has never been a thought, much less part of the building process. The home away from home was an oven, and as we had to be in London quite early to collect the key and get set up, we spent a lot of time roasting.
Things weren’t any better once we took a bit of time to explore. The Tube, and in particular the Central Line, was like a sauna. Needless to say, we weren’t in a rush!
How about a statue of King Charles II?
This was a nice rice dish at a small noodle place near the hospital.
In the wake of the operation, my daughter recovered more quickly than before, and was back to her usual self in little time. I was certainly grateful for all the efforts of all the doctors, surgeons and nurses that have looked after her.
I am also angry and heartbroken for all the parents, families and children for whom cancer causes so much pain. My daughter’s circumstances have ultimately not been nearly as bad as they could have been. Seeing kids as young as four or five years of age going through chemo, enduring so much hardship… well, I am already ambivalent towards the concept of benevolent gods, and witnessing children go through something as awful as cancer gives me further cause to doubt the mercy and compassion of any deity, if any exist.
The Resumption of Normality?
At the end of this long saga, the hope is that we can all go back to a normal life, or at least, as normal as possible for my eccentric family unit! Work should also start to return to something resembling normal, what with the arrival of colleagues. Of course, this is life, and life rarely runs smoothly. Yesterday we were down A&E, with my daughter complaining of a very bad headache, one strong enough to make her vomit. Given how she was fresh out of surgery and very tired from it all, my wife and I were in no mood to take chances.
Headaches are quite normal after surgery, and unfortunately for my daughter it also happened to be that Mother Nature was paying her a visit, which may also explain the issue. After waiting to be seen, she was placed on an IV and given fluids, and came home around midnight. My wife had more or less sent me home an hour earlier, but I stayed up until their return.
There was no rest for the wicked, because I had work the next day.
Resisting Temptation
Of late, errant and emotional individuals – well, one individual – has been desperately trying to goad me with their posts. It is tempting to dismantle their arrogant, and prideful, egotistical rants, but something tells me they want the attention. They crave my rebukes, almost like a BDSM sub craves a spanking. Sorry, I won’t be indulging their fantasies, I have much more important things to do 😉
Exhaustion
As we hit the end of this Muse cycle, it’s fair to say I feel very, very tired. The events of the past few months have been challenging, with a lot of back and forth, and a lot of stress. My daughter’s health is the absolute priority to me, but along the way I’ve had a fair bit of strain from work too. It’s typical for personal and professional stuff to go haywire at the same time, but it also seems that both sides of that equation are settling down. My daughter is fine, and work is straightening out. Nonetheless, I continue to keep a close watch on job opportunities.
July, and the second half of the year, now beckon. What awaits this meerkat? Hopefully, a good chance to recover from the absolute chaos of the first half. I do know that I will have a new book coming out, either this month or the next, which is pretty exciting. There might be a new tattoo in the immediate future as well! As to what else life has in store, all I can do is wait and see what unfolds, but I guess that’s true for all of us. Here’s to a good second half of 2026!
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