So I ventured onto Return of Kings earlier. I’ve bleached my eyes and can now offer up my views on one of their latest articles, even if I want to puke.
I’ve just read possibly some of the worst parenting advice any father could give their daughter (unless they actually want their little girl to be a complete doormat). shall we jump into this cesspit and see what we find? Where I’m quoting the article (written by one Dawn Pine), I’ll be highlighting the quote in purple.
1. Teach her what guys and girls find attractive
Example: Mr. Peabody & Sherman (the movie)
Next is the concept of “The Wall”
Do we really think this is a worthwhile message?
2. Show her how guys hit on girls
I day game sometimes. I don’t do it much in front of my girls, because they will cockblock me. It happened a few times before I “stopped”. I recall one time that they ran interference at a wedding, when I was about to number close a young hot girl.
But if we are in a restaurant for example, I tease the waitresses. I use pet names, boss them around a little bit and treat her as a small child. The waitresses usually take it very well, and sometime even blush.
This is horrifying. He treats women in a demeaning, dehumanising fashion, and the only reason he doesn’t do this in front of his daughters is because they might get betweeen him and some action. The only reason any waitress in these circumstances would pretend to tolerate such behaviour is because they are worried about rocking the boat and losing their job, because society thinks such behaviour should be tolerated. It’s objectification at its worst.
My daughters start to giggle. “Dad, I don’t know why, but I feel good when you do that,” my elder told me. “It is because older girls are like young girls. They love it when a successful man makes fun of them” I explained. “Also, you see that the waitress was responding well. She likes it,” I add. They witnessed it, and now they know how it feels and how it looks when a guy hits on a girl and what an interaction between boys and girls looks like.
Lesson hammered again. As a side benefit, now my daughters feel better knowing that their father is “Successful”. I’ll admit that my game level is intermediate at best, but good enough is good enough.
He’s brainwashing his daughters into thinking that a man can belittle them and objectify them as a means of courting them, and that this is perfectly normal and even desirable. In other words, he’s training them to have very little self-respect.
Section 3 of Dawn’s article relates to connecting to one’s heritage. I don’t object in principle to this, though I have to have concerns about how this concerns the wider message.
4. Work on their femininity
We are man and we practice masculinity. Femininity? Red-pill guys? How exactly? One would assume that this is the mom’s job. So what? We all know that women are not to be trusted with responsibility. So I gladly take some of this burden upon myself.
You can do it too. The funny things is that it is not that hard. It also correspond with the red-pill.
First example: Women highest calling
“What is the most important thing that girls can do?” I ask them. “Give birth” they answer. “And raise the child,” I add. This is something I always find the place to mention to them. There is nothing more important than continuation of our species. “Dad, what if we didn’t have kids?” They ask. “It will be the end of the world for our family,” I answer. “The family line will be lost”. It took some time to understand this, but now they get it. Now they know that kids are crucial and that they should have them and take care of them.
So in one breath Dawn says women can’t be trusted with responsibility then he goes on to say that women should do nothing but aspire to be mothers – erm, does anyone else see the obvious contradiction here? Being a parent is a huge responsibility, and Dawn’s idea is that this is the highest achievement his daughters can reach. He is also putting pressure on them to do exactly that.
Second example: Chores around the house
Not my best one (to say the least), but I try to have them do feminine chores around the house: Cook with me, fold laundry and so on. Just because I live alone and do masculine and feminine chores does not mean that my daughters can’t learn it also from me.
This is something that I lack, and should delegate more to them. It is a matter of preferences (I’m lazy in those parts and outsource some of those chores). When done correctly, you get your daughter accustomed to doing chores.
First of all, what exactly are masculine chores and what are feminine chores? If anyone – man or woman – is living by themselves, they will have to carry out both sets of chores! It is frankly stupid to define roles like this – there is only work to be done, and if it needs doing it needs doing. You’re a man who doesn’t want to peg the washing out or get out the vacuum cleaner? Boohoo, it won’t do itself, and if there’s no one else to do it, you’ll have to swallow your pride and get on with it.
This also links back to responsibilities. Women can’t be trusted, yet can be expected to fulfil important household roles?
Third example: Looks
In this case I have a good deal of help from their mom. She emphasizes looks, dresses well and wears makeup. Kids need to have discipline and getting dressed, even for girls is sometimes tiresome. Trust me, I use to be like that. When they sometime complain, I remind them that looks are important (see tip #1). This is where a cooperation between parents really kicks it in, and a lot of people mentioned how well they dress.
Whenever they form an opinion on someone (based on their looks), I hammer it home again. Looks are women’s top and dominant SMV component.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look good. There’s nothing wrong with taking pride in one’s appearance. There is something very wrong with suggesting to young girls that their looks are their only worthwhile asset.
Forth example – Future career
Kids do a lot of thinking on what they want to do when they grow up. That may change on an hourly, daily or monthly basis. I had my daughters move from teachers to waitresses to babysitters and to doctors – all in the course of one day.
When they come to me with the new career, I remind them that they will need to also be there for their kids when they are young. Then you see them spin the wheel to show me how it works great with a child (or more). At that time I also remind them that since they will marry a successful man (god, I hope so!) he will be the one providing for them, and they will assist.
This is just cruel. ‘Don’t even think about doing something you want to do with your life, if that doesn’t mesh with your required role as a mother’. That might as well be what the above paragraph said. He is funnelling his daughters down a specific path, one that makes him happy, but won’t necessarily make them happy.
That’s about all I can stomach for one night. There is more to this article, and I might return to it, but for now, I’ll leave this to someone else.